Divorce and separation are difficult times for everyone involved, especially children. In Virginia, when parents can't agree on child custody arrangements, the court decides based on a determination of what is in the child's best interests. This involves analyzing multiple factors, which can include the child’s expressed preference for living with one parent or the other. The weight given to that preference will vary considerably depending on the facts of each case. 

Virginia Code § 20-124.3 outlines the best-interests test a judge must follow when making a custody decision. One of these factors to be considered is "the reasonable preference of the child, if the court deems the child to be of reasonable intelligence, understanding, age, and experience to express such a preference."

The court will assess a child's maturity on a case-by-case basis. There is no automatic age at which their preference becomes a deciding factor. Generally, children aged 14 and over are presumed to be old enough to express a well-considered preference. Their voices will be heard and factored into the judge's decision.

For younger children, the court’s analysis gets more complex. The court may consider the preference of a child between 8 and 13 years old, but only if the judge is convinced the child's reasoning is sound. One reported case involved an eight-year-old girl whose maturity level convinced the judge to give her preference significant weight. However, other judges have found even older children to be too immature for their preferences to hold much sway.

The reasons behind a child's preference also matter. Judges won't heavily consider a desire to live with a parent who allows them to stay up later or have more screen time on their laptop. However, if a child expresses a strong emotional bond with one parent, the judge is likely to take that preference seriously.

Even a mature child's clearly defined preference does not guarantee they will live with that parent. The judge's ultimate decision rests on what they believe serves the child's best interests. If the judge believes the non-preferred parent offers a more stable or nurturing environment, the court may rule against the child's expressed wish. However, if both parents are seen as equally suitable, a child's preference could serve as a tie-breaker, tipping the child custody scale in favor of one parent.

Child custody cases are complex and require skilled legal guidance. Ernest Law Group, PLC in Virginia Beach is highly experienced in family law matters. Call us at 757-997-6617 or contact us online to set up a consultation.